So I could keep track of my travel experiences and remember things because I'm very forgetful. I wanted to be able to have a medium to let out my opinions, emotions and thoughts and digress about my day to people who I think would be interested in reading about my adventures.
Why do I go through my days so explicitly and deeply?
That's who I am. If you know me, you'd know.. I talk like this every day in real life. My day consists of checking out cute guys on the footpath and saying who I wanna fuck. So get over it. If you're going to judge me about this then do not even read my blog. If you are very religious, or don't like gays, or don't like pre marital sex, or gay pre marital sex, then this blog is not for you. On the other hand, do not mock me about it. This is who I am, and I'm proud of myself. If you don't like it, it does not bother me.
Why do I have a new url?
I had a friend in primary school and high school who I got really close to. In December 2012, he blocked and deleted me on Facebook. I wasn't so bothered... but obviously he has a vendetta against me nearly 1.5 years later writing hundreds of tweets on his private twitter (which one of my friends is a follower told me about), copying and pasting direct quotes on my blog calling me fat and a slut and stupid and teasing me about my acne and about the one thing I am most self conscious about - the fact I have one eye due to having cancer. I've gotten so much shit about this my entire life. You'd think it wouldn't happen but it does. I think it's the fact I had cancer and survived rather than died. I was so close to being fully blind and it could've spread to other parts in my body, so honestly I'm lucky in that sense, but it's becoming something that I am so self conscious about. So that's what happened. So don't give my link out to anyone, because that's betraying my trust. I post my link on Facebook because I care about you guys and want you to know about what I'm doing. Anyone on my Facebook list is lucky to be there considering how many times I've done "sweeps".
So what's different about this blog?
Escapades of discovery. Of self discovery, of global discovery, etc. I'm going to keep this blog even after my travels as my sort of consolation about life and something to just let it all out. I've had counselling before but I think my depression is getting worse and I need platforms to let things out rather than keep things in.
Why do I let things get to me?
Because there are only few people on my FB friends list who have the motherfucking homosexual balls at 19 years of age, going to the USA alone. Additionally, the age being 21+. Furthermore, I'm on a budget. I'm gay. Do you have the fucking balls? Did you work hard to base your trip around a $1.5k Britney Spears meet and greet ticket, flights, accomodation, food, shopping, sightseeing, laundry, medical? This shit didn't fall out of the motherfucking sky. I worked my fucking ASS off. I have THE RIGHT to brag about this. This is not luck. This is fucking hard work, determination, passion and persistence. Have a goal, work to achieve it, and you'll get it. If you let petty little fucking shit take over your life and make little decisions it will accumulate to one big bad thing. "You better work bitch" is totally right.
So let's get into it.
Today has really not been so adventurous.
I went on Grindr in the morning and saw a 20 year old with the caption
I blaze, I drink, I party, I got the right hookups. Top. 20 y.o
Interesting. He's 20 and he likes to do everything 21+ are only allowed to do.
I contacted him asking him if he knew where I could get a "f" (don't want to write the word incase the government is monitoring this), but you should get the point. I was going to meet him in an "Officeworks" sort of place to photocopy my Aussie ids - my uni card, my drivers license, and something I think I shouldn't have given him to photocopy, (not my passport) but the Brazilian Visa part of my passport but it has my passport number. When I saw him I was really worried because he looked really fucked up. Luckily I didn't go alone, I was with my German roommate Frank in case he tried to mug me to help protect me, because let's face it I'm a little girl. The guy knew I was tripping out and showed me the text convo with his lady friend who would manufacture it, and even called her about it. I told him I would give him the full payment when it was done, he said because it was not him making it there needs to be a downpayment. 50/50? No. He rang his friend, she wanted at least $75. So $75 out of $125 is what I gave. We are meeting tomorrow in a public place and cafe in the morning, so I'm thinking he's reliable. Worst comes to worst, I lose $75. But then again I have the problem of identity theft. Whatever happens after that time tomorrow, I'm going to the police and fabricating that I lost my wallet with a photocopy of my passport so at least there's some sort of barrier in case let's say someone wants to skip the border into Brazil (totes likely..).
I went back to the hostel and saw Joyce and she assured me everything will be alright. However, it's the only thing on my mind. I need today and tonight to go so quickly so I can just have that emotional security tomorrow. We went to Walgreens and Trader Joes and I bought some like grilled chicken strips which have 33 g of protein (fuck yeah) and a protein smoothie mix (fuck yeah) and... some Hershey's chocolate (noooo).
The Scottish girl backed out of Vegas which is such a shame, but we invited Frank to come with us to Vegas but not the creepy German guy. But we aren't sure if Frank is going with creepy German guy so we're not sure yet.
Right now it's dinner time and I'm going to pan sear my chicken strips and just eat it like that. I might have a tub of my Greek Yoghurt as well.
Budget:
$75 - f
$20 - Groceries
= $95.
I have nothing planned for tomorrow anyway, so this makes up for it.
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